If starship travel from our
Earth to some far off
star and back again,
at velocities approaching the speed of light
made you younger than me,
due to the effects of time dilation,
I'd show up on your doorstep hoping
you'd developed a thing for older men,
and I'd ask you to show me
everything you learned to pass the time...
out there in the endless void
If I became lost in
the multiverse, exploring
infinite parallel dimensions, my
only criterion for settling
down somewhere would be
whether or not I could find you:
and once I did, I'd stay there even
if it was a world ruled by giant overlords,
or one where killer
robots won the Civil War, or even
a world where sandwiches
were never invented...
Because you'd make it the best
of all possible worlds anyway,
we could get rich off inventing sandwiches.
If alien invaders come,
and we were captives together
in an alien zoo, I'd try to make
the best of it and cultivate a streak
of xeno-exhibitionism, and make jokes
about breeding in captivity.
Because I think our love could be a powerful
argument for the perpetuation
of humanity in general.
If we were the sole survivors
of a zombie apocalypse
and you were bitten and transformed
into a walking terror
I wouldn't even pick up my
I'd just let you take a bite
out of me, because I'd rather be
undead forever with you,
than alive alone without you.
If I had a time machine, I'd go back
to the days of your youth
to see how you became the someone
I love so much today,
and then I'd return to the moment when we first met
just so I could see my own face when I saw your face for the first time,
I'd probably travel to the time
when we were a young couple,
and try to get a threesome
going. I never understood
why more time travelers don't do
that sort of thing.
If digital singularity overcomes,
and we upload our minds into a vast
computer simulation of near-infinite
complexity and perfect resolution,
and become capable of experiencing any
fantasy, exploring worlds bound only
by our enhanced imaginations,
I'd still spend at least a million processing
cycles a month just sitting
on a virtual couch with you,
watching virtual TV,
eating virtual cheese curds,
holding virtual hands,
for the real thing.
I would love to give credit to the author. My friend found it in a Google search with no author listed and altered it.
And a few pictures from our trip...